Bangkok

I have never been a fan of long haul flights and successfully managed to avoid them for over a decade. This blissful abstinence abruptly came to an end with flight KL0803 from Amsterdam to Bangkok. It was, for the most part, just as I remembered. Long, tedious, noisy and the residual jet lag gave me a headache. Stepping out of the pleasantly cool airport into the hot, humid and polluted tropical air of Bangkok served to compound my misery. The hotel was a half hour taxi ride. We arrived at the relative sanctuary of our room with its air conditioning doing sterling service. This was wonderful. We could cool down, lie down and inevitably, fall asleep. In the evening we had a snack in the hotel café before heading back to bed. By next morning we felt just about ready to tackle Bangkok.

It is hot here. I think it is always hot in Thailand. 35°C by mid-afternoon. Everyone else seems quite comfortable with this but Diane and I sense that we are being slowly cooked. After a modest stroll round the park next door we felt thoroughly braised and retreated into a very nice French bar with air conditioning and chilled wine. The park was interesting. We were not familiar with any of the wide range of birds, flowers and or large reptiles swimming in the lakes.

Next day we went for a more urban experience and visited a shopping mall. Eight floors of retail heaven. Not really my thing but Diane needed some stuff and anyhow the whole mall was air conditioned. Bangkok is busy and crowded. Slums and modern high-rise offices snuggle together. Smart, young people step over the beggars on the pavement and everywhere you need to negotiate the street vendors. Everything from souvenirs to shampoo. Street food abounds. Small trolleys with a charcoal brazier cooking up a variety of snacks mostly involving meat and noodles. The range of smells is a whole nasal adventure of its own. Cooking often dominates, frying meat, garlic and vegetables with an underlying hint of burning wood. Traffic fumes complete with excesses of cheap perfume as people hustle along the pavement. The lakes and river add a damp smell while the sewers and pools of stagnant water are constantly lurking to remind you to just keep moving in some places.

A tuk-tuk driver offered us the unmissable tour of Bangkok for a mere two pounds. This was fun although I am far too big to fit into the back of a tuk-tuk comfortably. The vehicle leaned perilously on corners and squeezed through the dense traffic with mere millimetres on each side. Best just to shut your eyes sometimes. Obviously, we needed to visit the taxi driver’s various sponsors. The tailor was actually quite interesting but the high-light of the tour was a river trip. We had a long tail boat to ourselves. The ‘gondolas of Thailand’ feature a large engine on the back with a direct drive propellor. This whole assembly is pivoted so that the boat is controlled by driver wrestling the entire running engine. The result appears effective and is probably cost effective but it also looks remarkably precarious and dangerous. We bounced up and down the river for an hour. The water is a sinister brown colour and there is a tang in the air that reminds you to keep your mouth shut when spray comes over the bows. The tour included several temples and the royal palace. We paused at a one-man floating store to buy beer and mangoes.

Our last trip out was to a market not far from the hotel. Not really a tourist destination but still quite interesting. The total amount of food there was staggering. Looked to be enough to feed the whole of Bangkok. Vast mountains of chicken, fish and all types of vegetables. Porters ran round continuously with sack barrows shifting stuff here and there. From a distance, I imagine the market would look like a giant ant’s nest that just got disturbed.

Six days in Bangkok. One of the most popular tourist destinations in the world but also very hot, crowded and polluted . The air quality is at an all-time low. 200,000 people admitted to hospital with breath problems just this week. The Public Health Ministry say that we should wear masks outside. Time to get out of the city.